Silver Linings in a Time of Pandemic

by | Mar 22, 2020 | Author's Blog

  1. In a normal year about 100 people die each day in automobile accidents. With everyone staying home, there will be far fewer accidents.

2) Fewer people commuting means less air pollution.

3) With everyone sheltering in place, family members are getting to know one another better. Board games and card games are making a comeback.

4) People are reading more books to entertain themselves.

5) Since kids are staying home from school, you no longer hear about school shootings.


6) Looked at objectively, human beings are a scourge upon the earth. The fewer of us there are, the less negative impact we’ll have on the planet.

7) The majority of deaths are men. As men are responsible for most of the world’s ills, the fewer men, the less violence, and the fewer wars. The world would be a better place with more women in it. I can say this, as I am a man and I own my failings. 

8) The majority of victims of Covid-19 are old, and infirm. It’s a natural culling of the herd of the least productive among us. The positive effect is that losing that demographic takes pressure off the healthcare system and strengthens Social Security. It also frees families from the expense and responsibility of caring for their elderly. Cold? As a witch’s tit, but I can say this because I am a part of that demographic. If we die now with our wits about us, we will at least be spared the fright and indignity of slowly losing our minds as we totter toward the grave. And face it — we all have to get off this merry-go-round sooner or later.

My only concern is for younger victims, who should have most of their lives ahead of them.

A Distopian Present

by | Mar 17, 2020 | Author's Blog

March 17th, St. Paddy’s day.

I get the feeling we’re living in a Franz Kafka story. Here in San Mateo County we’ve been ordered to “shelter in place,” like sheep in the stockyards. We live in interesting times.

This pandemic, and in particular the world’s response to it, doesn’t seem quite real. We’re surrounded by hysterical pundits shouting impending doom. But the information has the whiff of an unreliable narrator. What are we not being told? This event will no doubt inspire dozens of apocalyptic novels and movies. The question is, after living through it, will anyone want to buy those books or watch those movies? In the meantime, I’ll whistle past the graveyard, write about the world as it was, and try not to contemplate an uncertain future.

Don’t worry, be happy, smile if you can.